Living A Lie

Today I discovered that for the last 16 years of my life I have been living a lie. I have always thought that my first name is Coy. Most people find this to be a very odd name. People like to try and make fun of my name and how weird my parents must be to name me that. I’ve lived through 16 years of fish jokes. Many people have asked why I have such an odd name; I think my parents told me that they saw some guy at a rodeo named Coy. They thought, “Hey! We should name our kid that!” So I was the next one they popped out and got stuck with the name.

 Recently I was playing Xbox with Caleb Hoskins and NicK (spelt with a k and not an h) Lindsay; Caleb made the discovery that “Christopher” seems to sound more natural. I agreed with him that Christopher sounded better, so I went and asked my parents if Coy was just a nickname or something. Mrs. Kelly said, “Oh coy boy, I always knew you would find out someday.” Now Mr. Kelly came in and said, “We thought it would be funny to give you a stupid name and see how weird you turned out.”

I was in disbelief that my parents would do such a thing to their favorite child, so I went and searched for my birth certificate. Once I found it I realized that the horrible story they were telling me is true. The birth certificate read “Christopher Coy Kelly” I was always told my middle name was Steven but apparently that was a lie too.

This is a true story and I ask that everyone start addressing me by my real name instead of this atrocity my parents gave me. I am done living this lie and its time I start my new life as Christopher.